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One of the men who brutally beat a gay man in the bathroom of the gay Stonewall Inn on Sunday insists that he is not homophobic. An unapologetic Matthew Francis told Metro Weekly:
According to the Daily News, Francis and Orlando entered the bathroom, asked Carver if he was gay, called him a f—-t and demanded money. Orlando pinned Carver down while Francis assaulted the D.C. man until he broke free. Stonewall bouncers chased and captured the men at the end of the street and police arrested them soon after. Carver, injured, required multiple stitches above his right eye.
Carver’s attackers are due back in court tomorrow, and are currently looking for family members to post $10,000 bail to free them from jail until the hearing.
By Ben Carver-
It’s been a rough few days. I’m currently traveling on the Acela to New York for an awards show (my company was nominated for an award by PR News Magazine), and I’m a little shaken by the news coverage I’m reading right now. Apparently tales of me getting my ass kicked are circling the globe through various newspapers and blogs. I was particularly disturbed by the New York Daily News culling status updates from my Facebook page and the New York Times calling my mother in an attempt to contact me (It upset her because she didn’t know what was going on). I’ve been contacted by what seems to be every newspaper and television station in New York. Apparently this is a big story there.
While I feel a certain amount of civic responsibility to bring awareness to the fact that anti-gay violence is an actionable issue, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have a demanding job, my entire body is sore from the attack, and I’ve got enough welts on my head to keep a low-grade headache coming in all directions. I also find the sensationalism of the press and the incorrect recounting by blogs to be less than exceptional. That being said, I appreciate the New York Post focusing more on me fighting back than in getting beat down.
I would rather not discuss this incident numerous more times, so for friends who have so kindly inquired to my health and perspective, thank you and please accept the following:
Until now, I’ve never had the experience of being brutally attacked. I was somewhat surprised that I never felt fear, before, during, or after the experience. During the altercation I only felt a singular focus to neutralize the threat. I’m proud of that. I’m also proud that in the aftermath, anger has not poisoned my perspective. I am a firm believer that when attacked, one should aggressively make every effort to fight back and eliminate the threat, but only to the extent that one needs to extricate themselves from harm. Violence for its own sake is never OK. I’ve read a few of the comments posted on one of the news articles online, and I’m disappointed by both gay and straight commenters who propose violence. We must not give in to this form of irrational thinking. We must be better than these bullies, and we must not give away our power to them by entertaining thoughts of fear and violence. While righteous anger is acceptable, we cannot let them take our peace.
I forgave these men immediately. The legal system will now decide on a punishment, and I will try to respect whatever decision it makes. What I hope is that at some point, the judgment will include (as a necessity) that these men are informed about the importance of stonewall, what it means to the L/G/B/T community, and that somehow they are given help to understand that all human life is precious and that violence is never acceptable. I would also like to give my condolences to their families, as I’m sure it’s a difficult time for their mothers.
One of the men who brutally beat a gay man in the bathroom of the gay Stonewall Inn on Sunday insists that he is not homophobic. An unapologetic Matthew Francis told Metro Weekly:
“I’m not going to sugarcoat what happened…It was a bar fight, but I swear on my life it’s not about gays or race or any of that. We don’t care about any of that stuff in this family.”He told the Daily News:
“My sister’s a full-blown lesbian, I don’t discriminate against gay people.”Francis, 21, and Christopher Orlando, 17, were charged with assault as a hate crime and attempted robbery. The New York Daily News reports the Staten Island men insist their attack on Ben Carver, 34, had nothing to do with his sexual orientation.
According to the Daily News, Francis and Orlando entered the bathroom, asked Carver if he was gay, called him a f—-t and demanded money. Orlando pinned Carver down while Francis assaulted the D.C. man until he broke free. Stonewall bouncers chased and captured the men at the end of the street and police arrested them soon after. Carver, injured, required multiple stitches above his right eye.
Carver’s attackers are due back in court tomorrow, and are currently looking for family members to post $10,000 bail to free them from jail until the hearing.
By Ben Carver-
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| Ben Carver |
While I feel a certain amount of civic responsibility to bring awareness to the fact that anti-gay violence is an actionable issue, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have a demanding job, my entire body is sore from the attack, and I’ve got enough welts on my head to keep a low-grade headache coming in all directions. I also find the sensationalism of the press and the incorrect recounting by blogs to be less than exceptional. That being said, I appreciate the New York Post focusing more on me fighting back than in getting beat down.
I would rather not discuss this incident numerous more times, so for friends who have so kindly inquired to my health and perspective, thank you and please accept the following:
I went to NYC with my boyfriend for a long weekend of leisure. I met with friends at the Stonewall, a bar made famous by being the location where the gay rights movement began in protest. I was having cocktails with friends at the downstairs bar, but was in full control of my faculties (In other words, not drunk). I excused myself to go to the restroom, a very tiny space with room for two urinals and a sink. Two men were waiting there, one of them urinating. I began to pee at the adjoining urinal, at which point one of the men asked me if I was gay. I responded by chuckling and saying “Where are you, buddy?” He answered me by saying “In a gay bar. Don’t pee next to me, Faggot.” (He may have said “piss”, but why quibble). I was in a good mood so I brushed this comment off as quickly as it arrived. The other man then asked me for a dollar. I responded that I didn’t have a dollar. The other man then said “how about a $20?” I then laughed and said, I’m not giving you any money.” I zipped up and turned to face them, and realized that they were both blocking the door and staring me down. I realized at this point that the situation had the potential to turn violent. One of them then said, “You wouldn’t be holding out on us, would you?” I replied that “I just have a card and I’m not carrying cash, but even if I were I wouldn’t give it to you.” I stepped forward and said, “Don’t escalate this situation. Please move and let me leave.” This is when the man I’ve learned to know as “Matthew” cold-cocked me in the face.Some additional thoughts:
The other man, “Orlando,” tackled me and pinned my arms. Matthew then hit me in the head approximately four times before I was able to swing away from him. Considering the extremely small space, there wasn’t much room to maneuver. The action happened very quickly so I can’t recall every movement, but needless to say it was very violent as I used any leverage I had to move the pile and get free of Orlando. I remember there were three distinct series where Matthew punched my head repeatedly, separated by the moments where our mutual crashing impeded his ability to land punches. All told, I believe his punched my head about a dozen times. I was able to break free by slamming Orlando back against Matthew and the wall. I was then able to get my left arm free, which I swung back behind me, connecting with Matthew’s face three or four times. That allowed me enough leverage to break free. I immediately saw a beer bottle sitting in the basin of the sink. I grabbed it and swung as hard as I could at one of their heads, but missed. Then I threw the bottle at them. They quickly recoiled back when I first swung the bottle, giving me just enough room to escape the restroom and run into the main bar area. I had blood streaming down my right eye and was dazed, but I immediately placed two hands on the pool table outside of the bathroom and searched the table with my good eye for a billiard ball to use as a weapon, being that I knew the men were right behind me. The table was clear, so I turned around and saw Matthew right behind me. I took a big step toward him and swung at him with everything I had, but missed him. After that it gets fuzzy for me. I heard screaming, someone grabbed me from behind, and people rushed between me and the two men. The attackers slipped out of the bar while I told the bartender that I had been gay bashed. I went back into the restroom to wash the blood out of my eye and off my face, then came back to the bar, where the bartender had an ice bag ready. I asked for a glass of whiskey, and I sat there and stayed cool while a few patrons perched over me. My boyfriend, a bartender, and a barback chased the two attackers around the block. My boyfriend called 911 while chasing them and tried his best to identify the action and location despite not knowing where he was. Eventually the police apprehended them due to the work of these three guys, the bar back in particular as I understand it. It should be noted that the staff of the Stonewall are some bad ass, take no shit hombres. My kind of queers. I would very much like to buy them a drink.
I was taken by the police to identify the two men in custody. I did this from the back of a police car. I recognized Matthew immediately. The other guy was not Orlando, and I told this to the police. The cops then took me to a waiting ambulance where they gave me a cold compress and took me to Beth Israel hospital where I waited amongst the numerous binge drinking young people resonating prostrate from poor life choices. Eventually I was given a CT scan to make sure I didn’t have any problems with my head/brain, and was then given three stitches above my right eye, which hopefully will not leave too dramatic of a scar. But if it does, so be it. I don’t want to die without any scars. Late the next evening I was called in to the sixth precinct in Greenwich Village, where I waited for a couple of hours before identifying Orlando in a lineup. After that I walked back to the Stonewall and left a message with the sweet bartender (I watched and waited for him for several minutes, with his back to me, try to arrange Barbie dolls and a glow stick in sexual positions on the back of the bar….I didn’t want to disturb his fine work) that I was the man who was attacked and that I would like to leave word for the bartender (Ben) and the bar back (Matthew/Michael?) that I appreciated their effort and consider them heroes.
I would also like to commend the exceptional work done by the New York Police Department and the DA’s office. The uniformed officers, the detectives working the case, the Assistant DA Karin Singh, the Captain of the Sixth precinct (Captain Cobb?), the EMS workers, and the Physician’s Assistant (Peter) who cared for me at the hospital were caring, professional, and highly competent at their jobs. I know people often complain about New Yorkers and their emergency services, but I will tell anyone that will listen that the term “New York’s Finest” actually means something. New Yorkers should be relieved and proud to be so well looked after.
Until now, I’ve never had the experience of being brutally attacked. I was somewhat surprised that I never felt fear, before, during, or after the experience. During the altercation I only felt a singular focus to neutralize the threat. I’m proud of that. I’m also proud that in the aftermath, anger has not poisoned my perspective. I am a firm believer that when attacked, one should aggressively make every effort to fight back and eliminate the threat, but only to the extent that one needs to extricate themselves from harm. Violence for its own sake is never OK. I’ve read a few of the comments posted on one of the news articles online, and I’m disappointed by both gay and straight commenters who propose violence. We must not give in to this form of irrational thinking. We must be better than these bullies, and we must not give away our power to them by entertaining thoughts of fear and violence. While righteous anger is acceptable, we cannot let them take our peace.
I forgave these men immediately. The legal system will now decide on a punishment, and I will try to respect whatever decision it makes. What I hope is that at some point, the judgment will include (as a necessity) that these men are informed about the importance of stonewall, what it means to the L/G/B/T community, and that somehow they are given help to understand that all human life is precious and that violence is never acceptable. I would also like to give my condolences to their families, as I’m sure it’s a difficult time for their mothers.
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